Dewmocracy is the worst form of government

AKA I don’t understand why Distortion is losing spectacularly. Unlike a lot of lime sodas, Distortion actually tastes like lime. Not artificial lime flavoring; real lime. And key lime at that. The best kind of lime excellently rendered in soda, and it gets voted into a distant third place.

It'd be nice if that middle one was at least in the race.

The other two flavors aren’t bad by any means, but they seem so thoroughly unremarkable. Typhoon? Indistinguishable from every other fruit punch-flavored soda on the market. White Out? Overly sweetened Fresca.

I suppose I shouldn’t complain too much, since my preferred flavor won last time around. Although last time I could actually see the appeal of the other flavors and wouldn’t have minded one bit if either of them had won instead of Voltage. The voting trends this time around leave me more than a little baffled. Not unlike my reaction to 2004, albeit without the dire consequences. I’ll be stocking up on Dewlicious Distortion while I can before Dewcision 2010 ends. Let this Dewtastrophe be on your own heads.

And maybe I should stop with the Dew-based wordplay. Dewpartee? No wait, that's terrible; I should definitely stop now.